


Midnight Visit

by BlackRoseBlooms



Category: The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Dubious Consent, F/M, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-14 01:00:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16029734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackRoseBlooms/pseuds/BlackRoseBlooms
Summary: When Barry and Iris have a fight Savitar seizes the opportunity to become reacquainted with the woman he still loves.





	1. That Night

Iris lie in bed, her eyes leaking tears against the satin covered pillow as she recalled the fight. The way she'd shouted at Barry, the way he'd lost his patience with her. The way they'd both stormed out and away from each other.  
“ _You need to be more careful, Barry! You could've been seriously hurt!”_  
_“I'm fine Iris. I've been saving Central City for the past three years. I'm not going to be failed by one meta.”_  
He'd been so sure of himself, in her opinion beyond the rational level of confidence, bordering on arrogance. Savitar was still out there and here Barry was making reckless decisions. Sure he was the scarlet speedster, he could outrun and outlast any danger he faced but he wasn't invincible. He wasn't immortal. Her biggest mistake was saying as much. The look Barry had given her was wracked with hurt and of course a bit of anger.  
“ _So what, you don't believe in me? You don’t think I can protect the city?”_  
Of course that hadn't been what she'd meant. She would always believe in him. But after watching Savitar take out her brother she feared losing Barry too. She couldn't bear to lose her Barry.  
_“Not if you're dead!”_  
Barry had turned away from her then, his jaw clenching in that way he did when he was pushed just about too far. His cheeks were already flushed with anger.  
_“I've been risking my life for the past three years and I've managed to survive.”_  
She'd moved closer to him, honesty coating her words.  
_“Eddie managed to survive for years too. Until he didn't.”_  
Barry had visibly winced at the reminder of her dead ex. Of his friend.  
_“I've already lost one fiancé, Barry. And now I've lost my brother. I don't want to lose you too.”_  
She'd thought he would understand, that he would soften but instead his eyes had set stubbornly.  
“ _Iris, I have a job to do. To protect this city. I can’t just ignore that duty because my fiancé is a little scared.”_  
That had been when she'd lost it. How could he say such a thing? As if she were some Mary Sue over-reacting about a kitchen mouse or something. This was his life for crying out loud! They'd both began yelling then until Harry had emerged from the lab to not so cordially tell them to either take that shit home or shut the hell up. Iris had ordered Barry not to come home until he came to his senses and apologized to her. Barry had announced that he'd stay with Cisco until she came to her senses and apologized to him. Now here she was cold and alone and missing him with every cell in her body.  
She'd cried herself half asleep when she heard him enter the bedroom. Her first instinct was to turn his way but she didn't want to be the one to apologize first. It had to be him. The fact that he was home said that it was his intention to do so at least. She lied still, her back to him when she felt the bed dip. A familiar hand touched her bare thigh tentatively.  
Instead of speaking, he let his fingertips lightly slide up and down, tingling her nerves. Iris closed her eyes, she'd been missing his touch. But she would stay strong. Nope she wouldn't react until he said those two words.  
Barry's fingers glided up her side, still feather-like. She was wearing a thin spaghetti strapped night shirt and panties leaving plenty of skin for him to play with. He leaned down and began pressing light kisses to that skin. Her arms, up her elbow to her shoulder, he slowly graced her with his sensual lips giving just enough contact to cause goosebumps. His fingers continued to caress her side before returning to her thigh. Iris felt herself relaxing into him.  
When his kisses reached the top of her shoulder he ventured to her back, shoulder blades and the spot just between. There he let his tongue swipe down. Involuntarily she sighed. Barry didn't react to her, still kissing down until he met the material of her night shirt. He scooted down, lifting it at the bottom to continue his worship of her slowly heating body. Her spine tingled as his tongue-slicked lips kissed that too.  
If this was his apology then…  
Barry lifted the waistband of her panties and kissed her hip beneath. Again Iris sighed. She gave no objection when he turned her over to her back, nor when he lifted her hips to scoot her panties off her body. Still she didn't speak.  
Barry resumed his kisses, down her thighs—both to be exact—before pushing her legs apart. Iris breathed, anticipation starting to moisten her. But her speedster took his time, kissing the inside of one thigh while stroking the other ever so lightly. He knew what he was doing. He knew how he was making her feel.  
When his lips touched a sensitive area just below her treasure trove she almost whimpered. Her nipples hardened considerably, standing stark in her braless night shirt.  
_Please just a little higher_ , she wanted to beg but until he apologized she wasn't speaking a word. That didn't mean she couldn't enjoy what else he could do with his mouth though.  
He was just at the juncture where thigh meets pelvis when he swiped his tongue out again. Slowly he traveled up the crease, the softness of her trimmed pubic area just on the other side. Then back down he went. She couldn't help it, he was so near that her body reacted. Wetness leaked throughout her nether walls, slipping out between her lips. She was more that just wet. She was saturated.  
_Please Barry._  
For a speedster he was moving agonizingly slow. On purpose of course. She couldn't recall Barry exhibiting so much patience before but then again they'd never fought like they had at Star Labs today so he had a lot to make up for. Still she found herself growing impatient with need.  
Before she could stop herself, she released a pleading moan. He took the hint and she could feel his smile against her thigh. Then his lips met her lower lips and he spread them apart. The next thing Iris knew, he was kissing her there too.  
Her hips shot up into his face as she gasped. With patience he took hold and eased her back down to the bed. She moaned again, giving up her silent treatment.  
“Barry…”  
He tensed for a second but then resumed tasting her. First with his lips, then with his tongue, then he began to vibrate against her. Iris screamed as she came even before he got his fingers involved. From there on she was lost.  
Her voice was a raspy mess when he was finished with her, sweat soaking the sheets from her thrashing about. Iris glanced down at him, heavy lidded with complete and utter sexual satisfaction. She’d lost count of how many times she'd come.  
“I love you so much,” he whispered to her, his face hidden between her open thighs.  
She reached down and stroked the top of his head.  
“I love you too.”  
He breathed her scent in deeply, exhaled with contentment. Iris could barely hold her head up so she sank back on the pillow.  
“You can't possibly know how much I've missed you.”  
But she could. It had only been eight hours and she'd been crying herself to sleep. She started to tell him that when he began kissing his way up her body. Her belly muscles twitched as he visited them, her ribs sensitive to his soft lapping until he stopped at her breasts. Just when she had nothing left, Iris felt herself once again energized by his attention. Her hand trailed through his hair as he suckled her mammaries, sending shivers through her nipples, straight down to her watering valley. She wrapped her naked legs around his waist.  
“Please, I need…”  
With the speed only he possessed his clothes were on the floor and he was back in position. Her night shirt was nowhere to be found. Iris could feel his hardness against her and she desperately grinded into it. It was Barry's turn to groan and when he did so it sent fire through her. So intense, so full of desire for her as if he'd been starved. He was ravenous. Then he was inside her.  
They both screamed out this time though his was more of a low growl. She'd never heard Barry growl like that before. It excited her the more. As he thrust inside her he kept his face buried in her chest, licking and suckling on a hard brown pebble. She cried out, attempting to match his thrusts.  
“God Iris,” he panted as he switched between breasts.  
Sweat dropped from his face to her skin.  
“Iris…mmm!”  
She threw her head back at his enthusiasm. Barry was a bit rougher tonight and she loved it. His arms held her a little too tight, his suckles would leave hickies on her breasts and the way he was stroking her…there was a new level of intensity there. Iris came once more, shaking all over with the impact. Barry cursed out loud and suddenly his entire body was vibrating. Even inside her.  
Though he'd definitely used that trick in bed before there was something different about his level of vibration this time. It was more intense in a way that she couldn't quite process. But it prolonged her climax and she arched hard against him for more.  
More she got. When he finally reached his breaking point he groaned so loudly that his voice cracked. It was the sexiest thing she'd ever heard.  
In the aftermath they collapsed together, boneless and panting. Iris could barely see through the haze of sexual bliss.  
“I…I accept,” she managed to breathe out.  
Barry lifted his face in the darkness.  
“What?”  
“Your apology. This was a hell of a way to do it too.”  
He didn't say anything, just stared at her adoringly. She reached down, cupping his face in her hands.  
Then she felt the scar.  
He didn't move when her thumb grazed it, in fact he leaned into her touch just as Barry had done anytime she'd performed the same action on him. But Barry didn't have speedforce burns on the side of his face.  
Iris's heart stopped cold.  
“Y-y-you—”  
Her would-be killer silently stared back at her.  
“Oh my god!”  
She started to shove him off. In less than a second he had her arms pinned above her head. Both naked, him still semi-hard inside her, their eyes met. What she expected to see in them was hatred, a smug sense of victory or some other villainous emotion at the scheme he'd just pulled. Instead she saw something far worse. She saw unbridled and all-consuming love.  
He inched his face closer, tearing into her mouth with a kiss that expressed that emotion before pulling back. Then in literally a flash, he was gone.  
Iris sat up, the shock of what happened and the sudden loss of his body warmth chilling her. She hugged her own naked body, bewildered.  
For the past few hours she’d just made the best love of her life…to Savitar. 

* * *

  
Barry lie awake, wishing more than ever that he could get drunk. He'd even settle for a buzz. After the fight he and Iris had earlier he needed it. She'd basically told him that she didn't believe in him, that he couldn't protect the city. Then she'd reminded him that he hadn't been able to protect Eddie. Or Wally.  
Barry dropped his face in his hands, feeling very much the failure. No, he hadn't been able to protect Eddie or Wally, but he'd do his damnedest to protect everyone else. To defeat Savitar.  
He stood from Cisco’s couch, tossing the blanket his friend had given him to the side. He wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight. There was a lot he had to think about, like how he was going to beat an enemy who literally knew everything he knew and the things he didn't.  
Barry crossed over to the window and stared out into the night.  
_I'm not apologizing._  
But he should. Because he missed her. And he loved her.  
_She should've believed in me._  
Especially at a time where he was having a hard time believing in himself. He needed her to believe now more than ever. Because without her…  
_I'm nothing._  
He should go apologize. Especially with Savitar ever so near. Of course he knew his twisted other self wouldn't kill her any time soon. He'd seen her death. It wasn't until a couple months.  
_If she doesn't believe in me then she doesn't believe that I can protect her. That I can save her._  
He pressed his forehead against the glass.  
She was probably in bed right now, wearing that little blue night shirt and her panties. No bra. Iris never slept in bras. She found them constricting. He imagined her pouting, still angry at him though she had no right to be. Turning her back. Refusing to speak to him until he gave in and apologized. She could be stubborn that way. She was Joe West's daughter.  
She was also the woman he loved more than life itself. The woman he would wed in holy matrimony. He shouldn't leave her alone, especially not in that sexy little night shirt. Barry made up his mind then. Seconds later he was in his own bedroom, kicking off his shoes. He expected to see Iris. Instead he saw an empty bed with fresh sheets. She must have done some cleaning.  
He found his fiancé standing on the patio wearing a pair of his flannel pajamas. All covered up, he noted with a hint of disappointment. She was sipping a hot liquid, most likely tea, given the late hour.  
“I'm sorry about what I said today.”  
She jumped when she heard his voice, spilling the entire mug over the rail. Using his speed, Barry zoomed down the side of the building and retrieved it, managing to catch the fluid back in the mug as well.  
When he handed it to her, Iris stared at him. She had a weird look on her face, like she had something to say.  
“What?”  
She reached a hand up to cup his cheek. Barry couldn't help but to lean into it. She watched him intently.  
“I love you, Barry.”  
His body warmed at her words.  
“I love you too.”  
“I've always believed in you. I'll never stop believing in you.”  
She set the mug down on the rail, her eyes drilling into his.  
“Let's never fight again.”  
He nodded.  
“Never leave me alone again,” she said.  
When she hugged him Barry closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around her as well. They squeezed tightly and he inhaled her freshly showered scent. Her hair was still damp. She must have taken a shower recently, unable to sleep.  
When he moved to reenter their loft, she refused to let go.  
“Iris?”  
She just pressed her face into his chest, tightening her grip. Their fight must've affected her more than he thought.  
“Just hold me, Barry. Please.”  
He was more than happy to oblige. They stood that way for the longest until he could see hints of dawn coming in the horizon. Barry nudged his fiancé and the two of them made their way back inside. Her eyes were barely open when he lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bedroom. In no time he was out of his clothes, in a pair of pj pants lying against her on the bed. Iris cuddled closer and he pulled her in. She was asleep before him but he followed soon after. Today would be a sick day for the both of them, he decided. Their jobs would just have to understand. 

* * *

  
She'd wanted to tell him. But the thought of the pain it would cause stopped her. She couldn't hurt Barry, couldn't see the darkness that would follow. He would try to end Savitar's life she was certain. Whether he succeeded or not he would never be the same.  
He would never look at her the same.  
Shame flooded her at not being able to tell the difference until it was too late. Until he'd thoroughly ravished her body with tongue, fingers and tool, making her scream into the night. Sure, technically he _was_ Barry, just a few years older but he wasn't _her_ Barry. She should have noticed.  
Her Barry was amazing in bed, even without using his speedster abilities. Apparently he was destined to become even more so. The thought caused her to blush with arousal.  
He could never know.  
She supposed it was possible that Savitar might want to gloat, throw what they'd done in Barry's face to break him but the love she'd seen in his dark eyes suggested different. He hadn't come to her that night to torture Barry. He'd come for himself.  
She should hate him. For trying to kill her, for trying to hurt Barry, for misleading her to think he was Barry but she couldn't. Especially after what she'd seen in his eyes. After what he'd done to her body. He was still technically Barry. She could never hate any version of him.  
So no one would ever know, the secret would stay between the two of them. And no one would have to be hurt.  
Iris closed her eyes against her fiancé’s chest then, the weight of the night upon her. She would sleep now, safe in the arms of the (future) fastest man alive. She would have to save her guilt for the morning.

 


	2. The Morning After

She dreamed of him. Of Barry kissing, snuggling, touching her beneath the fabric of the warm flannel pajamas she wore. His pajamas. Iris woke to find those familiar kisses caressing her neck, turning her on. She moaned, never able to resist the skillful touch of Bartholomew Henry Allen—the man she loved. Not even last night when—  
Savitar!  
Alarm shooting through her, she jumped up and grasped his face in her hands. Barry's eyes widened as she turned his face back and forth, inspecting for the scars.  
“Um, Iris Sweetheart, what are you doing?”  
He was lost, confused. She stared for a moment, before relief filled her. This was her Barry. As it should be beside her in bed. On her neck. His hand gently cupping her beneath his shirt.   
“Sorry just a nightmare.”  
His hand had stopped moving against her breast but its warmth was still there. Now that she was sure of who he was, it brought her comfort.  
“You want to talk about it?”  
His concern was genuine. Always caring about her welfare. Iris wanted to confide in him then, the truth about the incident but again the thought of looking in those warm, loving brown eyes and telling him…that was too much.   
“Doesn't matter,” she dismissed it.  
“What matters is that you're here with me.”  
She awarded him a kiss to his lips. He groaned happily and resumed his sensual massage of her body. All tension and troubling thoughts fled as Barry shifted her down on her back and climbed over her.   
“You can't possibly know how much I missed you last night,” he whispered between kisses.  
 _“You can't possibly know how much I've missed you.”_  
Iris pushed the memory out of her head.  
“Barry, shhh.”  
He complied, slowly undoing the buttons of his shirt on her body. His chest was already bare. She ran her hands up his back, reaching into his hair; ready to pull his face into her chest when she remembered the marks his future self had left on her. Dark and prominent and ever so fresh hickies from less than twelve hours ago. She couldn't let Barry see them.  
“Wait, wait.”  
Guilt slammed her at the thought of hiding from him but she had no choice.  
Barry slowed down.  
“What's wrong?” he frowned.  
“I have to get to work.”  
His mouth flipped into a smile.  
“Don't worry about it. I called us both in sick today.”  
He leaned down to continue their kissing.  
“You what?” under normal circumstances she'd be relieved but at the moment she needed an escape. Something to give her a reason to leave before he saw too much.   
Barry blinked, that uncertain look he got when he was unsure if he’d made the wrong move or not.  
“You were so tired. And you didn't get any sleep. I thought…should I have asked first?”  
No, he'd made the right decision. The perfect decision. Because he was perfect.  
“No, Barry you're fine. It's just…” she had to think quick.  
“I have a deadline. I really need to go and do some research.”  
He raised an eyebrow skeptically.  
“Research?”  
She nodded.  
“Yea.”  
When he didn't move she gave him a soft shove. Disappointed, Barry rolled over to his back.  
“Anything I can help with?” he offered.  
“You know I read pretty fast.”  
She hurried from the bed and toward the bathroom.   
“No thanks. This is something I have to do,” she called to him.  
Before stepping into the shower Iris did something she’d never done since she and Barry had moved in together. She locked the bathroom door. She hated herself for it, felt like a second betrayal but what could she do? Her shower was harried, as if Barry might walk in any minute and catch her fingers tracing over the evidence of the night before. She needn't have bothered.   
“Meta bank robbery, gotta go!”  
All she heard was the front door slam then she was alone. For the moment anyway, depending on how big and bad this meta was. Barry could handle himself either way. He had an entire team behind him. And he'd always have her. It occurred to her then that Star Labs was the place to be right now. Regardless of what happened, her place was always with him. She finished her shower and prepared to join the team.

* * *

 

“Iris is acting weird.”  
Barry plopped atop the table at Star Labs, waiting to be scanned. This particular meta he'd just locked away had a nasty power of infecting anything he touched with a toxin that increased bacterial development by light-years. One touch and you could grow mold on your face.  
“What do mean?” Cisco was preoccupied with adjusting the scanner.  
“I mean I thought we'd made up last night. I went home; I apologized. We hugged and all that stuff. But then this afternoon she didn't want to make up. In fact it seemed like she was trying to avoid me altogether.”  
Cisco clicked the contraption on and proceeded to scan his friend.  
“I thought you said you made up last night.”  
“We did but we didn't _make up_. That's like the only good part of fighting. It's the making up.”  
The engineer frowned.  
“Oh, that's not good.”  
Barry's heart jerked.  
“Oh god, I'm infected?” he almost freaked.  
Cisco glanced up.  
“What? No, I meant you and Iris. You guys haven't even gotten to the honeymoon yet but the honeymoon phase is over?”  
Barry shrugged his confusion.  
“I don't know. Normally everything's fine but today she was just different. You think she's doing that thing where women say it's fine but it's not fine and then when you think it's fine they're mad that you don’t know it's not fine?”  
His friend looked at him, just as baffled.  
“Okay, complex technologies and physics equations I can figure out but women? You came to the wrong guy. This sounds like a Caitlin question.”  
But Caitlin wasn't home. She was currently being occupied by Killer Frost. Barry groaned his frustration.  
“I don't know what to do.”  
“Well how about talking to her? Just come out direct and ask her.”  
Yea, right. If she were in the mood for direct then she wouldn't be the one avoiding him.   
“I guess.”  
The scanner made a noise and Cisco shot him a thumbs up.  
“All clear. No toxin.”  
That was good news.  
“Hey, you think Joe might be able to get out what's wrong with Iris?” Barry wondered.  
Cisco gave him a horrified look.  
“You're really going to ask Joe why his daughter is being stingy with the nookie?” he asked.  
God no!  
“Of course not! I mean he might know if she's still mad. Maybe she vented to him or something.”  
His friend shrugged.  
“Can't hurt. Just leave out the detail about…you know.”  
He didn't have to worry about that.  
“If we're done here?”  
“Yea, Barry it's all go—”  
He zipped off before Cisco could finish.

* * *

  
Five minutes after his departure, a troubled Iris entered the lab. Cisco glanced over from his screen to wave.  
“Oh hey Iris. You just missed Barry. He totally kicked meta ass.”  
She nodded, suddenly relieved. It must have shown on her face because Cisco cleared his throat awkwardly.   
“Where is everybody?” she asked.  
“Oh, H.R. is out doing his thing. Julian's at a conference until the weekend and Harry's on his own Earth. It’s just me for the moment.”  
Iris sighed.  
“That works out then. Seeing as you’re the person I need to talk to.”  
She’d decided that with his unique ability he was just the person to help her with her Savitar issue. Sort of.  
“Me?” he was taken back. Iris didn’t often come calling for him.  
“I just have a few questions. About Savitar.”  
He shuddered at the name.  
“Creepy right?”  
She’d thought so until last night.  
“So he's actually Barry right? Just from the future?”  
“Yes and no. He's a time remnant, which is Barry but not our Barry. Not directly. Our future Barry is still Barry just a sad Barry instead of a psycho Barry.”  
Right.  
“And you can be sure of that, because you can vibe the future?”  
He was giving her a questioning look.  
“I guess?”  
Iris sighed. She'd have to give him an explanation for her line of questioning. But for now she pressed on.  
“Is there any way to tell the difference?” she inquired.  
Cisco almost laughed.  
“You mean besides the big funky scar on half his face?”  
That wouldn't help in the dark. Between the sheets. Or from behind.   
“Suppose you can't see his face?”  
Now the young genius appeared thoughtful.  
“Hmm, well I guess there may be scientific ways. Like with Harry and H.R. they're both Harrison Wells but from different universes so they function on different frequencies. Savitar is from our universe and technically was our Barry at some point so he'd be on the same frequency but he is faster than our Barry. Maybe we could use his speedforce calibrations to—”  
Iris's phone went off. Her first thought was to ignore it but it could be Barry. She held up a finger and checked it out. A strange number had been saved in her phone as “S.”   
**S: I need to see you. WentCorp Factory in 30min.**  
Her stomach fell. She knew who S was. But when had he…speedster. He could've done it right before her eyes and she wouldn't have picked up.  
“Iris, are you okay?”  
She blinked up from the text to find worried eyes on her.   
“Oh yea I'm fine. Just work, you know.”  
She shoved her phone back in her pocket as if he could read the text.  
“If you want I can talk to Harry about us creating a Savitar detector similar to the meta detectors of his world. I'm sure we can figure it out.”  
That just might do the trick.  
“Sure, yea that would be great. I have to go. Do a thing. For work so…thanks Cisco.”  
She gave him a quick hug before rushing off to her car to be alone. She barely noticed Cisco tense up, he was probably feeling awkward at such a rare gesture from her. Once safe in her car she opened the text and read it again. Anxiety flooded her.  
Why did he want to meet her? Did he expect a replay of last night?  
Well he's not getting any of that!  
Of course an old shutdown factory wasn't exactly the spot for a saucy rendezvous. If that was what he was looking for then he'd have picked somewhere much more romantic. Barry was if nothing a total romantic.  
 _He's not my Barry though._  
She shouldn't go. Avoid him at all costs. The man was trying to kill her for god sakes. Not to mention he'd totally violated Barry and her bed by coming in and impersonating him. She should never see him again.  
But…  
What if there was still a little bit of Barry in there? Beneath the darkness, the anger, the crippling depression that had twisted him into the cold soul that he was. What if there was just one kernel of Barry in there begging to be tended to? To be nurtured.  
She couldn't leave any version of Barry in pain. Maybe she could reach him. And if not she could always demand answers about last night. Why he'd done what he'd done.  
Iris started her car, her mind made up. She would go to Savitar whether to comfort him or confront him, she had to see him. Maybe then she could put the events of last night behind her.  
As she drove off she was completely unaware of a morbidly shocked Cisco staring out of the Star Labs window, totally freaked out by the vibe he'd caught when she hugged him.


	3. The Meeting

“Barry, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be sick?”  
Joe was still at the bank crime scene, where The Flash had apprehended the yet unnamed toxic meta culprit. He'd been startled to see Barry pop up beside him in civilian gear.  
“I need to talk to you about Iris.”  
Joe went on immediate alert.  
“Is she all right?” he loved his daughter with every fiber of his being. He'd already lost a son to Savitar. He wouldn't lose her too.  
“Oh yea she's fine,” Barry assured him.  
“It's just, did she say anything to you. About being mad at me?”  
Joe gave him his patented _Are you kidding me_ look.  
“You came all the way down to a crime scene on your Sick-day just to ask me if your fiancé who you live with is mad at you?”  
Well when he said it like that it sounded silly.  
“Technically I came _back_ to the crime scene,” he reminded the detective.  
Joe did not appreciate the fact.  
“Barry—”  
“She's avoiding me and after that fight yesterday I figured maybe she'd said something to you.”  
His future Father-in-law softened slightly.  
“Well did you apologize?”  
Barry nodded.   
“It seemed like she accepted until she started avoiding me today. You think she's doing that thing—”  
“That women do when they expect us to read their minds? Maybe. Try getting her flowers or something. You know what she likes.”  
Barry frowned.  
“So she didn't say anything?” he'd hoped for insight, something to explain his fiancé’s behavior.  
Joe shook his head.  
“Not to me. Listen some of us didn't play hookie from work today so if you'll excuse me I need to get back to my crime scene.”  
Joe left him to his own devices, catching up to a uniformed cop to question him. Barry sighed, ran his fingers through his hair in contemplation. Flowers, huh. Could it really be that simple?   
“Hey, Allen I thought you were sick,” another detective called.  
Barry quickly covered his mouth in a fake cough.  
“Uh, yea—” cough “—off to bed now!”  
He backed around the corner, still performing until out of sight. He caught Joe shaking his head at him before he dipped behind an office building and sped off.  
Flowers. If that was all it would take to get things back to normal with Iris then that was what he'd do. Anything to make her happy.

* * *

 

“You came.”  
His voice was monotone, void of emotion as if making a casual observation. Iris glanced up from shoving her car keys in her pocket to see his face, that horribly scarred yet handsome face and saw that his eyes reflected something different. She remembered the look he'd given her the other night and her entire body flushed.  
“You summoned me,” she responded.  
Summoned, like he was the court of law or something. Then again, in his head he was. He did plan to orchestrate her execution. And he was certainly judge and jury toward Barry. Her Barry. The sweet, undamaged version of himself.  
He nodded in agreement.  
“I just thought, after the other night you would…” he seemed vulnerable then, his voice trailing off.  
“You mean when you tricked me into making love to you,” she'd meant her voice to sound harsher.  
His lips barely formed a smile but his eyes lit at the wording.  
“Making love.”  
She felt a smidgeon uncomfortable at his light chuckle. As if he were making fun of her.  
“I don't make love, Iris. I fuck.”  
She would've believed him had she not seen his eyes after the deed, the unmistakable blaze of emotion. Of love. It was the only reason she’d shown up to this meeting at the old WentCorp factory. If he could still feel love then there was still hope for him.  
She leaned against her car, feeling the breeze pick up.  
“You keep telling yourself that.”  
He responded with a sneer. But now she knew better.  
“Why did you call me here?” she demanded to know.  
He folded his arms under his chest.  
“Maybe I called you here to kill you.”  
When he saw that she wasn't convinced he glanced away.  
“I…I wanted to see you,” he finally murmured.  
An honest answer, she knew.  
“Why?”  
Briefly he met her gaze, an agitated look as if to say _you know why_. But then it was gone. He shifted awkwardly, a maneuver so Barryesque that she had to concentrate on his scar to remember that he was not Barry. Not her Barry anyway. Iris wondered if he realized just how much of the younger self he hated so much still dwelled within him. In his mannerisms, even the way he nervously scratched the back of his neck when directly confronted with feelings he was reluctant to admit. Feelings for her. She knew better than to point that out though.  
“You didn't tell him.”  
Of course he knew that.   
“I couldn't.”  
His eyes darkened bitterly.  
“Protecting the man you love,” he didn't hide the acid in his tone.  
Iris folded her arms this time.  
“It's better than killing the woman you love,” she confronted.  
He blinked at the accusation.  
“I don't—”  
“That's not what you said the other night. After you—”  
Demonstrated the best tongue techniques known to civilization. Just the memory of it made her walls contract. She involuntarily clenched her legs.  
“—did what you did.”  
He smirked naughtily.  
“You mean ate you out?”  
Clench.  
“Cunnilingus?”  
“Stop!”   
She didn't need a reminder of how good he'd felt. Savitar watched her with knowing eyes. He knew her too well. Could read the color in her cheeks. She had to take the power back in this conversation.  
“You said you love me. Do you remember that?”  
It worked, the teasing heir left him immediately.   
“My memories are all intact Iris,” was his clipped reply.  
“Then why are you still doing this?” she had to ask.  
Terrorizing Barry. Trying to kill her.  
“Doing what?” he remarked, “trying to survive? To exist? To become a speed god? Why not Iris? Why the hell not?”  
“Because you'll kill me,” she came back.  
“The man I saw last night didn’t seem like he wanted that.”  
He took a threatening step closer.  
“What makes you think you know what I want?” he hissed.  
She met his challenge with a forward movement of her own.  
“Because I know you. Inside and out. You may be Savitar now but deep down inside, at your core you are still that little boy that my dad brought to live with us all those years ago. You will always be Barry Allen.”  
That was the wrong thing to say. In a blur of red lightning she found herself pinned to the hood of her car, his hand wrapped around her throat. Iris gasped as he glared down at her, his body looming with a menace that her Barry never could.  
“I am NOT BARRY ALLEN!!” he raged.  
In that moment she believed him.   
Savitar's face drew to hers then and Iris trembled at his proximity. Out of fear, she told herself, which was partially true but, there was something else, something she dared not acknowledge. Something she'd never have imagined until last night.   
He was still technically Barry…  
He paused not even an inch from her face, his nose brushing hers as his angry breath fell upon her skin. She felt her lip quiver. Felt something else clench and contract below. Dark eyes glared into hers, angry and frustrated and aroused. The next thing she knew he was kissing her, hard and demanding. Iris gasped and his tongue forced entry. She could feel his hips between her legs as they began to move directly against her center. There was no mistaking the hardness there. He was solid as a brick.   
For a moment she fell into it, her body responded instantly and she returned the motion. Her hands found his face and she cupped both cheeks as their tongues wrestled with passion. His taste was manna. She couldn't get enough. Then she felt the scar and remembered. This Barry wasn't hers to have. Guilt ridden, she jerked her face to the left.  
“I can't!”  
He paused, his breath heavy.   
“Iris.”  
She shut her eyes so as not to see the desire on his face.  
“I love Barry. I could never cheat on him.”  
He scoffed.  
“How is it cheating when I _was_ once him?”  
She bit back the moan his hot body encouraged.  
“You just said yourself that you're _not_ him.”  
He didn't respond.

A second later his weight was gone. Iris opened her eyes to find him back at the old factory's entrance, where he'd originally appeared. He rested against the post, a miserable scowl on his face. She sat up.  
“Is this why you called me here? To get in my pants?” she accused.  
The future speed god glared back.  
“Do you realize how insulting that statement is after all my memories of your _begging_ me to get into your pants? I was your fiancé for god's sake! That thing you and Barry did last weekend—I remember every detail!”  
When Barry had done—oh! Yea, thinking about that would not help her current situation. Again her walls tensed below, eager to be invaded. Savitar gave her another knowing look.  
“But you're not Barry. You're trying to destroy him. By killing me.”  
He pushed off the post, straightened his posture.  
“What would you have me do, Iris? Lie down and die? Particles disperse as if I never existed? The woman I see in front of me now doesn't seem like she would want that.”  
Iris didn’t answer because he was right. Now that she'd met him, seen how much of Barry he truly was she couldn't stomach the thought of his dying.  
“We can find another way.”  
His laugh was bitter, harsh.  
"Iris West, are you trying to save me?" he taunted.  
Maybe she was.  
"If Reverse Flash could find a way to exist after Eddie died—"  
"Only to be hunted down by Black Flash" he reminded her.  
"I'm sure Cisco can come up with something. We have a lab of brilliant minds at our disposal. Harry, can even cross back over. There has to be a way we can help you."  
Skeptical eyes watched her, dark and too jaded to be Barry's.   
"Let me guess, if we work together we can find a way? Just have a little faith?"  
He was making fun of her again. That struck a cord and she suddenly snapped, "This isn't a game! I'm trying to keep you alive!"  
He smirked.  
"Listen to you, fighting for my life. Careful, I might start to think you love me."  
It wasn't his words that unnerved her, it was that expression, the sure of himself knowing expression that Barry used to get when he knew the answer before anyone else in class. When he'd seen the end of a movie before she had and just couldn't resist giving it away. Like he knew something. That look caused her to harden her gaze.  
“I'm in love with Barry Allen, not you.”  
Just like that, it was gone. His jaw clenched, exactly as Barry's had during that awful fight. She should tread lightly.  
“I won't ask to see you again.”  
Then he was gone, leaving her with the shadow of his kiss still on her swollen lips.

 

 


	4. Bad Vibes

“This better be good, Ramon.”  
Harry was his usual pleasant self when he crossed back onto their Earth at Cisco's request. He met the young engineer in his lab, no attempt to hide his irritation at being called over.  
“Right because I usually call you over for milk and cookies,” Cisco couldn't help but to snip back.  
Harry didn't say anything but his look did. He wasn't in the mood.   
“Okay, I need your help with something. And the sooner the better. Something really bad may happen if we don’t figure this out.”  
He remembered the vibe and shuddered uneasily. Harry seemed to pick up his urgency and approached his desk.  
“What is it Ramon? Savitar?”  
Oh yea, too much Savitar.  
“Who else? We need to come up with a way to tell him from Barry. Besides the obvious thing on his face. I was talking with Iris and we had this idea about tapping into his speed frequency since it's faster than Barry's. At least until Barry eventually reaches that level.”  
Harry was thoughtful.  
“It could work temporarily. But we'd have to get Savitar close enough to get an accurate reading. It would have to be precise. Because he technically is Barry any slip up could lead us to read our Barry instead of him.”  
That was what Cisco was afraid of. Harry frowned his way.  
“You vibed something, didn't you?”  
He knew he had to answer. But exactly what he'd seen he couldn't say. Well he could say but maybe he should talk to Iris first. Definitely not to Barry.  
“Yea, I did but don't ask me what I saw.”  
Never the one to be dictated to, Harry folded his arms authoritatively.  
“What did you see?”  
He reminded him of his father then, the stern no nonsense expression. The same one Joe used on Barry when he wasn't being straightforward. Harry wanted an answer. Cisco suddenly felt sorry for Jessie if she'd had to endure that look all her life.  
“It's personal,” he sputtered.  
Then he turned from Harry to get started on the project. They would have to hurry things along if they wanted to stop Savitar.   
“Personal. You called me all the way from my Earth to create a device for something _personal_?”  
The irritation was real. But so was the need for privacy. Cisco had to protect Barry.  
“Look, we can waste time arguing about what constitutes a good reason to cross over or you can help me stop Savitar from destroying my best friend,” he put his foot down.  
Harry had always been a man of logic. Seeming to weigh the options he went for the one that made the most sense.  
“Fine. Just don't get in my way.”

* * *

  
Barry had perfectly laid out the flowers, decorating the floor, the couch, leading a trail to the bed. The shop owner had recommended roses because that was just the thing to do but he'd decided on Irises. Irises for Iris because _duh_. He knew it was cheesy but he loved her and cheese was a small price to pay for the woman he would spend the rest of his life with.   
Barry adjusted the candles, took a step back and surveyed the loft. Yea, if this didn't get him back in Iris's good graces he didn't know what would.   
Okay now to wait for her arrival. He expected maybe she would be back no later than an hour or so. There were no big stories or juicy scoops to be found as of late. Whatever “research” she had shouldn't take long. When the third hour passed however he figured he should text.  
 **Barry: How's the project going?**  
Iris didn't respond. He sighed. She couldn't still be that mad at him. She'd kissed him earlier. They were at least on speaking terms.   
_Maybe she really did have research to do._  
But he knew Iris. He could tell when she was throwing up an excuse to get out of something. That research line had definitely been an excuse. So where was she?  
His immediate fear went to Savitar. Of all of the metas to pop up he was the biggest threat. Could he have taken her?  
 _No he’s been sticking to a schedule so far. He won't hurt her yet._  
That did little to quell his fear for her safety. He shouldn't have left her alone. What if his evil remnant kidnapped her and planned to hold her until the time came to...   
Effectively panicked, Barry gave his fiancé a call. When her voicemail greeted him, he felt his world crumble. She was in danger! Before the recording even finished he was at Star Labs, startling a very busy Cisco.   
“Whoa sheez B-Barry!”  
His friend visibly jumped at the surprise, dropping the contraption he'd been working on. Barry had no time to register the other male in the room before he was spilling.  
“Iris is missing. I think Savitar has her. I need you to hack into the city's surveillance footage. Starting with my building. Everything we got since that bank heist.”  
Cisco was staring, looking weird.  
“Uh…Savitar has her?”  
Barry headed for the monitors.  
“I think so. She hasn’t been home and she's not responding to my calls or texts.”  
He tried to calm himself but the thought of losing her—god he couldn’t take it.  
“Have you tried calling Joe? Maybe he's seen her,” Harry crossed over to join him at the monitors.   
“I—” no he hadn't.  
Pale with worry he dialed his adopted dad. Only to have Joe confirm that he hadn't spoken to her all day. When Joe called her as well and it went to voicemail that put the whole team on alert.  
Iris was missing.   
“Okay, let's all stay calm and focus,” Harry advised them.  
“We know he's not going to kill her for another month or so. And torturing Iris isn't his M.O. so even if she’s with him, she's alive. If that's even where she is.”  
Barry was pacing when Harry looked to him.  
“Anywhere else she could be? Maybe with a friend or taking a breather? From yesterday?”  
He was referring to their fight. Barry ran nervous hands through his hair.  
“No we made up this morning. Sort of. We were on good terms when I left.”  
“What do you mean sort of?”  
Before Barry could think of a non-embarrassing answer, Cisco was speaking.  
“I tracked her phone to Fit-Spa gym on—”  
Barry was gone before his friend could finish.  
He didn't bother with the front desk but zipped around the entire facility until he spotted her. Clad in a sports bra and workout tights her hair pulled back into a ponytail, Iris was pounding her tennis-shoed feet on the treadmill. Her gorgeous skin was glowing in sweat as she huffed from the exertion of her workout. He found himself pausing to admire the beauty that was soon to be his wife.  
She was breathtaking.  
Barry stared for a moment before catching himself and approached her with relief.  
“Iris!”  
“Barry?”  
Seeing him threw her off and she briefly lost her stride. She stumbled but before she could hit the floor, he caught her in his arms. Iris gasped in surprise.  
“What are you doing here?”  
She snatched the earbuds from her ears.  
“What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”  
He continued to hold her in his arms, awash with relief. It wasn't lost on him that she was slightly panting from the run and the scare. That and her sweaty state was reminiscent of other strenuous activities they'd enjoyed together.  
“You weren't answering my calls,” he replied.  
“I was worried.”  
“Aww,” she cooed.  
“I thought Savitar had you.”  
Her body stiffened suddenly and she was pulling away. A bit disappointed, Barry allowed her up on her own to feet.   
“No—no Savitar. Just me at the gym. Keeping fit.”  
Iris glanced at the treadmill and grabbed her towel on the side handle bar. Barry watched her dab her face and neck with it, her eyes not quite meeting his.  
“My phone is in the locker.”  
“Iris, is something wrong?” he needed to know.  
She'd avoided him today and lied about research. Now she seemed to be working her frustrations out at the gym.  
“Is this about yesterday? Because I'm really, really sorry for how I acted. I shouldn't have talked to you like that.”  
She finally did look up at him, regret in her eyes.  
“No Barry, I'm the one that's sorry. I have no reason to be mad at you.”  
Her fingers brushed his right cheek again. She'd been touching his face a lot since their fight. He didn't mind a bit.  
“I love you so much,” she told him.  
“Then what's wrong? I feel like you've been avoiding me today.”  
Her eyes lowered from his face to his chest.  
“I just…”  
He waited for her to finish but instead she pat his shoulder and pulled away again.  
“Can we not have this conversation out here, while I'm all gross?”  
He wanted to joke that she was far too sexy to be gross right now but a weight in his chest prevented him from doing so. It had been a suspicion before but now it was confirmed. Something really was bothering her. Something was truly wrong.  
“Just let me get a shower and we can head home, okay?”  
He had no choice but to nod. Iris left him for the locker-room then and Barry wandered over to the front area to wait for her. For a man of speed the time dragged horribly. He ran his hand down his face, wanting so badly to whisk his love home in a flash and let her shower there. He could join her and she could explain what was on her mind.   
_It has to be this Savitar thing._   
Of course. If he couldn't save her then she had months to live. As the time drew closer she was bound to be more on edge. And again with the potential killer wearing his face that had to screwing with her. It was definitely screwing with him.  
 _He's not just wearing my face though. My face is his face._  
He still couldn't process any version of himself ever wanting to hurt Iris. He would throw his own life away first.  
When his fiancé emerged from the locker-room she wore a pensive expression. His concern blooming the more, Barry took her hand in his.  
 _This is about more than that fight yesterday._  
“Take me home?” Iris asked.  
He nodded before dropping a kiss on her forehead.   
“Sure thing. But we talk when we get there. No more running from me. Okay? ”  
Iris couldn't even look up at him which caused him to worry more.  
“Okay.”

  



	5. Good to Me

He kept glancing over at her, that worried crease between his brows. Iris kept her gaze averted, hoping to hide the guilt inside. She'd never meant for Barry to worry about her. He didn't deserve the pain.

The ride was stretching into the most uncomfortable silence. She could see Barry growing more tense, knowing that there was a problem but unaware of what and why. She wanted to alleviate that tension. But to do so meant to tell the truth and the truth would hurt far more than anything he was experiencing now.

His fingers were tight along the steering wheel. His posture none too relaxed. If she knew Barry (and of course she knew Barry) then he was obsessing in his mind over what he could've done wrong, when he'd done it and how to fix it. Her poor fiancé would drive himself mad if he kept this up.

Showing mercy, she reached over and rested her hand on his knee for reassurance. Cautiously, Barry glanced down at it. She could feel his muscles loosening up when she gave him a squeeze. No words were spoken but the communication was there.

He relaxed even more when she took his hand upon exiting the vehicle. Their trek to the loft was silent. As Barry opened the door she swallowed nervously, still unsure of what she would tell him. All she knew was that he couldn't know the truth.

Those thoughts were soon forgotten when she noticed the place. Iris felt her heart swell at the flower petals decorating the floor, the candlelight illuminating the room. Her hand left Barry's to clasp over her mouth.

Forget the fastest; her man was the _sweetest_ man alive.

“Oh my god, Barry.”

Her eyes were already tearing.

“You did this for me?”

She was taking in the scenery when he turned her back to face him. Iris couldn't help to sniffle at the pure and genuine love she saw in his eyes.

“Of course I did it for you. I just want to make whatever it is right again. I love you Iris. I would do anything for you.”

That did her in. She threw her face into him, her arms wrapping around and squeezed her fiancé with all the love she felt. He returned the gesture naturally and she could feel his chin resting on her head as she buried her face in his chest.

_And I would do anything to protect you, Barry._

Including keeping her secret. His heart was too precious to be broken. Content with their contact, Iris sighed. After a few minutes, however, Barry was pulling away just enough to look down at her.

“So...are we going to talk?” he prompted.

She’d rather avoid the talking. Hugging was perfectly fine. Her fiancé saw her hesitation.

“I think I know what's been bothering you.”

She highly doubted that.

“It's Savitar isn't it?”

Just like that, the warm contentment was gone, replaced by a sharp anxiety. Savitar? Why was Barry bringing up Savitar?

“I knew it,” he said softly, reading her tension.

His hands began to run up and down her arms in a comforting motion.

“It's in your body language. At the gym. Now. It's weighing on you. But believe me Iris, I will never let him hurt you.”

His eyes sought hers. Instead of looking up into them and risking exposure, she studied his chest.

“I know Barry.”

Her arms tightened around his waist.

“I trust in you to keep me safe. I meant it when I said I believe in you.”

_It's myself I don't think I can trust anymore._

“Then talk to me, Iris. Tell me what's going on. I know we can work through it. I know we can fix it. As long as we're together—”

He was too good for this world. Moved by the sheer purity that was her Barry Allen, Iris threw her lips onto his. Emotion ruled her, the intensity of it manifesting in the motion of her tongue. Barry opened immediately, groaning on instinct as she took control of his mouth. With a gentle shove Iris backed him into the couch and Barry allowed it, huffing excitedly as he fell. When his arms moved to pull her down with him, Iris nudged them away before looking him in the eye.

“No Barry. Let me do this.”

She felt he deserved it. He'd more than earned it. He was so understanding, so patient, so willing to give her every benefit of the doubt.

“Let you do what?”

She didn't answer, dropping the kiss down his strong neck as her hands began to undo his belt. She felt Barry breathe deep and recognized his arousal.

“Iris—”

“Shh.”

He was hot. Figuratively as well as literally. Iris touched the skin just inside his collar, giving him another reason to moan. Pleased with his reaction, she lifted his shirt over his head. Barry licked his lips when their eyes met again and Iris smirked with a naughty promise. His green eyes lit up with heat.

Iris left his face to return to his neck, using her tongue to trace down pale skin, circle his Adam's apple, kiss at the light mole that was barely noticeable unless you got close enough to actually taste it. Her fiancé shifted under her, ready to touch but again she swatted his hands away. This treat was specifically for him. She could wait.

Barry released a hard breath when she kissed down his chest. The muscle was hard, tight and she licked between each pec before settling on a hard pink nipple. That caused a shudder of delight from her lover.

“Nghh.”

She continued teasing him, loving the low groans he made at her doing. Rolling her tongue over his abs she paid attention to each dip, kissing each muscle with appreciation.

Iris felt his eyes on her as she took to her knees, her fingers maneuvered the snap of his slacks. Anticipation, desire and yearning had Barry nearly buzzing as he lifted for her to slide them down his thighs. She pulled them further until they were off his body entirely.

When Iris ventured back up she was greeted with a very swollen, rock hard form of her fiancé’s manhood. With a seductive glance up at him she took the whole thing in.

“Aghhhh!”

Barry was taken. Served him right for all of the times he'd made her scream. She relaxed her throat to press her lips down to his base before gliding back up to suck. He uttered a pleasured noise on response. Just what she wanted to hear. She decided to go for more. Louder, deeper, she wanted to give Barry something to make up for the turmoil she'd put him through. To let him know that she was dedicated to him and only him.

Using every technique in her arsenal, Iris worked her man to a vocal completion. She couldn't help the pride in her heart as he choked out his elation, his hips thrusting his climax into her mouth.

She swallowed every last drop of it.

Barry then yanked her up onto his lap, causing her to straddle him. He kissed her hungrily, not giving a damn about his own taste on her lips. His chest was burning as he held her against him.

“What was that for?” he panted out after coming away for air.

She touched his nose with hers.

“For being so good to me. You're the most amazing fiancé ever.”

He smiled lazily, his cheeks a delicious shade of flushed post orgasm.

“I can show you amazing,” Barry offered.

His hands slid to her backside. Iris leaned down to his lips once more when suddenly they heard a beep. The meta app. Another one already.

“Damnit.”

It wasn't often that Barry swore but when he did it was in the midst of sexual relations or some other passionate task. Iris couldn't help to giggle at his outburst.

“Patience, Speedster,” she teased with one last kiss.

“I'll still be here when you get back.”

Barry shook his head.

“Oh no, I'm not letting you out of my sight again. You're coming with me this time.”

Before she could form the first syllable of protest they were at Star Labs, Barry dressed as if seconds ago his pants hadn't been on the floor. Cisco and Harry were already at the monitors ready to brief him.

“The Water Treatment Plant,” Cisco informed him.

Barry was in his suit and off, leaving what remained of his team behind in a gust of wind.

“I see you two made up,” Harry noted without glancing back at Iris.

She blinked, briefly confused before remembering that he'd witnessed the fight yesterday.

“Yea, we did.”

That was the end of the conversation as Barry was on the comm reporting the meta's power of liquid transmogrification. Iris listened in, not a scientist by any means but willing to contribute wherever needed.

She barely noticed her phone go off in her back pocket.

_Could be Dad._

She'd seen a missed call when she'd left the gym. One glance at the screen, however had her heart jump-starting.

It wasn't her dad at all. It was _him_.

Glancing over at Cisco and Harry she was relieved to see that they paid her no mind. Why she was so cautious made no sense; it wasn't like they knew who was texting her. It could be work, it could be an associate. They weren't her only friends…

Apprehensively, she opened the text. Her entire body flamed at the acknowledgement of her encounter with his past self.

**S: You're good to me too ;)**

 


	6. Vibes Out

The next couple of days rendered nothing from Savitar. No texts, no attacks on the city. Just nothing. Iris thought she would be relieved but instead she was anxious. Why the sudden silence? What was he up to? Had he truly meant what he'd said at their last meeting?  
 _“I won't ask to see you again.”_  
She'd made it clear to him that she only loved Barry— _her_ Barry. If not in words definitely in her actions that evening. He'd made a point to remind her that he remembered as much.   
So what was he doing? Was he laying low? Plotting? Purging her from his heart and mind? It would make killing her much easier. It would also make saving him a lot harder.  
Why was she thinking of saving him?   
Iris went back to work, Barry resumed his usual as well. Julian's flight was delayed due to weather so he'd be gone a little longer. H.R. was being H.R. She did notice Harry hanging around though. Upon inquiry she discovered that he was assisting Cisco with the project they'd discussed after that night. Which was a good thing: two genius brains were better than one. Unfortunately her genius fiancé could not add his brain to the mix as anything he knew would become a direct memory of Savitar's.  
She also noticed that Cisco was acting a little strange. Avoiding eye contact, keeping a spacious distance from her. Like he was almost embarrassed or something. She wasn't sure what to make of it so she decided to approach him on it.  
“Cisco, can I talk to you for a sec?”  
Barry was down at the station with her dad and Harry was trying to sort something out with H.R. so they had a moment of privacy.   
“Umm sure,” he kept his eyes on the keyboard as he entered whatever algorithm into the system.  
“Hey. I'm over here.”  
His fingers paused. He managed to look up in her direction but failed to lock on her face. Okay, she hadn't been imagining it.  
“What's the deal with you lately? Did I do something to weird you out?”  
Cisco was already blushing uncomfortably.  
“Uh no. W-why would you think that?” he sputtered.  
“You're not weird. You're Iris. Barry's fiancé. Our friend. Who is not weird at all.”  
She folded her arms under her chest.  
“No but you're acting weird. Cisco what's going on?”  
He shifted uncomfortably.  
“Going on? Nothing. Why does something have to be going on? Nothing is going on. Except work I mean. Those metas you know. Keeping me busy with their shenanigans.”  
He released a nervous laugh that nearly made her cringe. Using her cop father's technique, Iris leveled a stare at him. Again Cisco shifted but was no match for a detective's daughter.  
“You vibed something didn't you?”  
His eyes found the wall.  
“Vibe? No, no what do you think I just go around vibing things? Like uncontrollably or something. Pssh! I don't—I don't vibe things.”  
His face was growing redder. His arms crossing his chest defensively. Iris recognized when someone was hiding something. Again, detective for a father. She would just have to be firm.  
“Cisco cut the crap. We’re supposed to be a team here. How can we work together if we can't trust each other? If we're keeping secrets?”  
He began biting his thumbnail anxiously, still eyeing the wall.  
“I don't think I'm the only person in this room keeping a secret.”  
She studied him. What was that supposed to mean?  
“What are you talking about?”  
He was still unable to say. His unease worried her.   
“Cisco—”  
“I think I hear Harry calling.”  
He hopped up from his seat, ready to bolt. Iris used her own body to block his path. He froze, tried to dodge her, but she was quite agile and met him head on. Given no other choice, the young engineer had to finally face her.  
“Okay, okay maybe I did accidentally see something,” he reluctantly admitted.  
“But I haven't told anyone because I don't want Barry hurt.”  
Barry hurt? Now she was alarmed.   
“Wait, you're vibing about Barry getting hurt and not telling anybody?!”  
That didn't make sense.  
“No—no Barry's not the one in the vibe. You are.”  
Her heart nearly choked her in fear. Cisco had vibed something about her. Something that had shaken him to the point where he couldn't even look at her.  
“Me?” she barely whispered.  
“What could you have vibed about me?”  
Cisco's eyes found his feet. He opened his mouth to answer but it was H.R.’s voice that called her attention.  
“Oh hey Iris! Glad you and Barry made up.”  
He entered the room with a very annoyed Harry trailing him.  
“You know, if you and Barry need, I once did a stint as a couple's counselor in Bermuda. My Earth Bermuda, not yours. There was this lovely elderly—”  
“Do you even have a license?” Harry interrupted.  
H.R. shrugged.  
“Well no but—”  
“Then you're as much a counselor as you are a scientist. Now shut up and let us get back to work.”  
He turned toward Cisco.  
“I think I have something. We'll have to test it out but it may work.”  
Relief washed over the engineer's face as he hurried after the retreating Wells. Iris stared after them, still processing what she'd heard about the vibe. She was in it. And Barry would be hurt. Could it be something more about her death?  
“Guess that leaves the two of us,” H.R. was smiling.  
She glanced up at him.  
“What?”  
He came beside her, wrapped an arm around her shoulder congenially.  
“The two non-scientists. Hey, while they're busy tinkering away with the Savitar detector you want to grab a Big Belly Burger?”  
She started to say no. She wanted to remain at Star Labs and question Cisco further on his vibe. But he was working on something important, something that could save her from making the ultimate mistake…again.  
 _Knowing the difference didn't matter at WentCorp did it?_  
She shut that thought down, refused to remember how she'd responded to Savitar's angry body against hers. Participated in the kiss. At least she'd stopped herself.  
“Sure. I could use a break from here,” she accepted.  
She'd left the office early so her day was clear. Lunch would be a treat. The burger joint was its usual mode of busy but she didn't mind the distraction. As kooky as he could be at times, H.R. wasn't bad company either. She actually welcomed his musings about their world, his world and the book the team had inspired.   
“But enough about me,” H.R. relented after a while.  
“What's going on with you and Cisco? I mean _awkwaaaaard_ am I right?”  
She glanced up from her fries.  
“So you noticed too?”  
He shrugged.  
“A writer pays special attention to the details of his surroundings. Nothing escapes his eye, not a leaf rustling, a hair blowing, an engineer tucking his tail every time his best friend's fiancé comes within his vicinity. Oh a writer notices everything.”  
The dramatic wave of his hands actually got a chuckle out of her.  
“Yea, I guess. But to answer your question, I don't know.”  
He took a big gulp of his drink.  
“Well whatever it is, I hope you work it out. With the way he's been carrying on you'd think he saw you naked or something.”  
He went back to his food then, once again chattering about his adventures. Iris listened, picking at her fries as Cisco’s words replayed in her head. Secrets. He'd accused her of keeping secrets.   
But what secret had she kept from the team? Barry had been the biggest secret keeper lately, hiding her death from her. What had she hidden?   
Only one thing came to mind. But Cisco couldn't have vibed that. Could he?   
_“…I haven't told anyone because I don't want Barry hurt.”_  
A wave of nausea suddenly hit Iris and she had to quickly excuse herself from the table. She found the restroom just in time and after losing her entire lunch she rinsed her face and mouth in the sink.  
Had Cisco really vibed what had happened that night? Or maybe what had almost happened the next day? God if he had…   
She'd have to get that vibe out of him. Sometime when they were completely alone with zero chance of interruption. Maybe at his place since Star Labs was so open.   
_It only happened once. And I didn't know he wasn't Barry._  
But that didn't make it any less a secret. Nor did it excuse their kiss on her car hood. Yes she'd stopped it from going further but she'd still kissed him.   
_No need to panic. Maybe he didn't see any of that. Maybe he saw something else._  
She had to calm herself. Had to get the facts first. She was a reporter after all. That was what reporters did. With a paper towel she pat her face dry. Yes, that was what she would do.

* * *

  
Barry was all smiles as he concluded his work day. Things seemed to be back to normal. Iris was no longer avoiding him, their love life was back on track (maybe even a little better). Though she was still a bit antsy at times he attributed it to the looming Savitar threat. But she was okay with him again. She was his Iris again. He would protect her from the wannabe speed god.  
“Earth to Barry, Hello?”  
He blinked, realizing that Joe was standing right in front of him in the doorway.   
“Huh?”  
His future Father-in-law was half amused.  
“You're thinking about Iris again, aren't you?”  
Barry could only smile sheepishly. Joe laughed out loud.  
“Still that lovesick kid after all these years. Some things never change I guess. Listen, while I have you here I need you to take a look at something.”  
Not giving him an out, Joe took his shoulder and led him back toward his desk.   
“It's a case I'm working on. Not sure if it's meta related but either way you're the guy to see.”  
Barry glanced over at the clock with a sigh. It was one minute after seven. Okay, so he'd have to wait a little longer to get home to Iris. All in the name of protecting the city.   
As it so happened, little longer turned into another hour or so. Joe insisted on going over all of the evidence, possible theories and motives for the attack. He was in full detective mode. Barry listened, added his opinion but when nine o clock hit they both called it a quits. Hopefully it would be another meta-free night.   
“So no plans with Cecile tonight, huh?” Barry noted as they bid each other goodnight.  
Joe shook his head, exhaustion evident in his shoulders.  
“Maybe this weekend. Tonight I'm just going to turn in.”  
He looked like he could use the rest. Barry left him to it, heading home with the same intention in mind. Hey Speedsters needed sleep too.   
Iris had been kind enough to leave dinner out for him and though she'd already eaten she sat with him while he ate. They cuddled after his shower and after making love, Barry found himself content to doze off with his arms full of the future Mrs. West-Allen.   
For once, today was a good day.

* * *

  
Iris waited until she was sure that Barry was deep in his sleep. She knew what she had to do but she couldn't risk anyone being around to interrupt. Or to overhear. Star Labs was not a good place because Harry and H.R. were around. And even when Barry was working he could easily speed in for a minute or two. And her dad, well he managed to pop up less since Wally but he was still very much a part of the team. Thankfully she didn't have to worry about Julian for a few more days.  
Iris carefully slid from her fiancé’s arms. Barry protested slightly in his sleep but nothing more than a groan. She watched him for a minute or two to be sure that he didn't wake. Once satisfied that he was still out, she hurriedly dressed and headed out the door.  
She made it to Cisco's apartment in no time. His lights were out, obviously since it was—wow two in the morning! But she had to find out about that vibe. She had to know!  
Ignoring the risk of his neighbors waking, she pounded on his door. (They didn't know her anyhow. Just saw her in passing). It took a few times and her yelling out his name before the door finally opened. Standing before her was the groggy, disheveled and pj clad engineer. He looked adorable in the red flannel, reminding her of the little brother she hadn't had the chance to grow up with.   
“Iris, what are you doing here? Did something happen to Barry?”  
She nudged her way inside, turned to face him as he shut the door behind her.  
“You need to tell me what you saw in that vibe.”  
Cisco was wide awake now.  
“W-what?”  
He crossed his arms nervously. Uncomfortable.  
“There's nowhere to go. No Harry to save you. Cisco, please. If I was in the vibe then I have a right to know what you saw.”  
She was going to get an answer or she wasn't leaving. Cisco seemed to pick that up and sighed resignedly.   
“Iris—”  
“Talk!”  
He swallowed, not used to her tone. But it worked.  
“The other day, when you came to me about how to tell Savitar from Barry…I got the vibe then.”  
Finally some honesty.  
“Okay…” she urged him on.  
Cisco was staring at the floor.   
“It was…it was you in the vibe…with…Savitar…” he was red in the face as he spoke.  
Iris felt her stomach drop.  
“With Savitar?” she repeated.  
He nodded.  
“You have to give me more than that. What was going on? Was he killing me? Were we fighting? Did I scream?”  
Cisco's blush deepened.  
“Oh you were screaming,” he murmured.  
She didn't like the sound of that.  
“Will you just come out with it already?! What did you see?”  
By his behavior she knew what he was going to say. But she wanted to deny it, maybe by some miracle it wouldn't be what he was so clearly hinting at. She needed to hear that it wasn't what she feared.  
Her fiancé’s best friend dared to look up at her then. Their eyes met and she could deny it no further.  
“You were…being intimate. Very intimate.”  
He cleared his throat. Darted for the kitchen. Iris cursed under her breath. So Cisco had seen the other night. Someone else knew.  
“You can't tell Barry.”  
He was back in the walkway between the rooms.  
“Excuse me?!”  
Iris looked at him, pleading her case.  
“I didn't know. When he came to me, I thought he was Barry. I didn't know until I touched his face. It was so dark…” she felt her eyes begin to sting at the betrayal.  
“And after the fight I just…Cisco please. It'll crush him. I don't know what he'd do if he found out. He might go after Savitar and cross a line our Barry should never cross.”  
Cisco stared, a mixture of disbelief and indignation in his face.  
“Iris, the scar covers half his face. That's pretty easy to spot. I certainly did and I wasn't nearly as close as you were!”  
She felt shame growing once again.   
_I should have been able to tell the difference._  
“I'm sorry okay! I didn't know until after. I'm not excusing it, just trying to explain. I would never hurt Barry. You know that!”  
She wiped her eyes, not meaning to cry. She hadn't come over to cry. She'd come for answers. Well she had them. Cisco didn't say anything. Now it was she who couldn't bare to look at him.  
“Are you and Harry having any luck on that devise?”  
After Savitar's last words at the factory she might not need it. He hadn't contacted since the text (why did she feel a twinge at that) but just in case.  
“We're coming along. We just need to get a scan on him to compare with Barry. Once we isolate their frequencies we can pinpoint the exact difference and use that. We have everything on Barry already. All we need is to get close enough to Savitar.”  
She sniffled in an attempt to right herself.   
“We just have to lure him out, I guess. The sooner this is done the better.”  
“I think we both can agree on that.”  
A pregnant silence.  
“Barry doesn't know you're here.”  
She shook her head.  
“Weren't you the one talking about secrets on the team earlier?”  
She opened her mouth to defend herself. Realized that he was right. Despite her intentions to protect Barry she'd become dishonest. And a hypocrite.   
_But what choice do I have? I can't let Barry know._  
But could Cisco?  
“Please don't say anything,” she pleaded again.  
“You and I both saw what happened to Barry when Savitar beat him before. If he knew about this, what do you think it would do to him?”  
No enemy had bested Barry like Savitar. Of course Savitar _was_ Barry in a few years so his improvements were a testimony that Barry would become faster, craftier and (don't think about the bedroom bonuses) even more powerful. Unfortunately they were dealing with the damaged version of him. One that, until the other day, she hadn't realized could be mended.  
“When this is over. And Savitar is gone for good, you have to tell him,” Cisco said firmly.  
“Secrets are what got Wally killed. What gave Killer Frost the edge over Caitlin. No more secrets on our team, Iris.”  
He had a point but this wasn't a team issue.   
“Cisco, I know you mean well but what happens between me and Barry is between me and Barry, okay?”  
He shook his head, rejecting her statement.  
“You're marrying my best friend. Do you really want to start off that union with dishonesty like this? Barry deserves so much better than that.”  
Ouch.   
“You need to tell him. He can't hear it from anyone else. Have you even considered if Savitar throws it at him in the middle of a fight—”  
“He won't do that,” Iris was sure.  
Again she recalled his eyes that night. The love, the longing.   
“You don't know that. He's cray cray! He's trying to destroy Barry at all costs,” Cisco argued.  
But Iris did know that much at least. Their encounter wasn't about Barry. It was about her. He missed her. He still loved her.  
“He’s damaged, Cisco. But he won't do that. I just know.”  
When her friend merely stared incredulously, Iris realized it was time to go. She couldn't explain it to him; he wouldn't understand that Savitar still held the love of Barry Allen deep within his dark shell. He wouldn't understand that as long as that glimmer of light remained there was a chance that…  
“I have to get back to Barry.”  
She stepped around him, letting herself out. She didn't turn around nor did she stop until she was in her car, speeding back home before her fiancé woke.

 


	7. Rendevous

He stood over his enemy, the past version of the man who had ruined him so far in the future. He was so young here, so wide-eyed and full of hope. Full of the belief that he could actually make a difference in the world for the better.

_Sanctimonious brat._

Barry Allen was a fraud. Just a stupid kid who only cared about himself and his own wants, his own needs. Ruining timelines, changing people's lives...destroying people's lives. Then abandoning them once their services were no longer required. Someone like that didn't deserve happiness.

Savitar clenched his jaw, remembering the isolation. The rejection. The looks that said "You're not the _real_ Barry." As if he weren't flesh and blood and bone. As if his memories, his feelings, his life differed in any way from the Flash they knew and loved. He was the Flash too, had been the second Barry had been. But they hadn't seen him that way, his so-called friends and family. To them he was just a clone, a substitute who, once he'd served his purpose, it was just too weird to have around.

Too bad for them, because once he was a speed god, he'd be more than around. He'd be forever. Infinity!

Barry turned over to his side, reaching over unconsciously for the fiance that wasn't there. Savitar smirked, remembering how he'd loved to hold her in his sleep. Especially after the death threat had arisen. Iris had mentioned it to his past self over breakfast one day, finding it romantic.

_"You're so sweet, even when you're sleeping you try to protect me."_

She'd given him a peck on the lips. When she'd started to pull away to finish her breakfast he'd pulled her back to him.

_"I'll always protect you."_

Fucking liar. Making promises he couldn't keep. Typical Barry.

_I wish I could end you now._

Of course he couldn't without ending himself. And he very much enjoyed being alive. Despite the pain, it would all be worth it once he became a speed god. Besides, maybe it was better this way, to see the anguish on Barry's face for years to come. Knowing that he put that anguish there.

His smirk spread into a smile now. There was nothing he loved more than hurting this weaker version of him. Nothing more satisfying. In fact he couldn't recall ever feeling more alive since he'd escaped the speedforce.

_Iris wrapped her naked legs around his waist._

_"Please, I need..."_

The future Flash paused at the memory. No, he was wrong; _THAT_ had been the most alive he'd felt since his escape--since anything. Being with Iris again, buried inside her, feeling her need him. Hearing her beg him. He brought his thumb to his lip and bit down on the knuckle as the memory stoked arousal within him. The way she'd panted beneath him when he'd kissed her below. The way she'd whimpered and wailed. The way she'd shaken and thrashed as she came all over his face...

_Fuuuuck._

He needed her again. Just one more time. Maybe two. Maybe...

He didn't know where she was, but he knew she'd be back. And he knew what time because at some point Barry would see the footage but...forget Barry, he needed Iris. He missed Iris. He (don't say that word because it meant nothing to him) loved Iris. With that thought on his mind he was gone, sure to reset the alarm so that Barry would not be the wiser.

Then he was in the parking garage, waiting for the woman (he refused to admit) he still loved to return to him.

XXXXXXXXXX

She'd just parked the car when she spotted him, standing out in the open with his hands in his jacket pockets. No hood, no attempt to hide his presence or identity. His eyes trained on her.

Iris swallowed nervously.

He hadn't contacted her in days except for that one text. Now he'd shown up at the loft? Briefly she felt a hint of fear for Barry. Had he done something to him? Had he hurt him? But his plan had never been to hurt Barry directly. It had always been to hurt him through killing her.

"What are you doing here?" she tried to sound stern as she climbed out of her car.

She failed. His ghost of a smirk said he noticed.

"You missed me," Savitar noted quietly.

Her heart skipped. No she hadn't. She'd just been worried about what he might be up to. Safety of the city and all.

"I think it's the other way around," she responded.

"After all _you_ came here to _me_."

He just looked at her. Like at the factory but even more intense. She tried to meet him head on with a steely gaze of her own but felt herself wavering under his scrutiny. Barry never made her anxious like this.

"You and Barry have been busy."

She blushed, knowing exactly what he meant by the lilt in his tone. It still freaked her out that he knew whenever she touched Barry. That he could remember every encounter. But she couldn't just cut Barry off. They'd always had a healthy sex life.

"He's my fiance," was all she gave him, hoping that point would shut him up.

She didn't feel comfortable talking about _that_ with the future version of her partner whom she'd happened to accidentally cheat on him with. It felt so wrong.

"Did you think about me, Iris?"

Her heart leaped.

"W-what?"

Savitar stepped closer suddenly, his eyes burning through her with unbridled lust and affection.

"When he's touching you, do you think of me? Of the things that I can do? Like how you cried when I--" he slid his tongue out and Iris nearly fainted when it began to vibrate.

"You act like Barry can't do the same thing," she resisted, backing away.

He took another step closer.

"Not like I can."

Her feminine region tensed at the menacing yet seductive tone he'd taken with those words.

_Not yet anyway._

She would have to change her panties when she got upstairs. They were already growing damp.

"You have, haven't you?"

Dark eyes penetrated her, reading her with the familiarity of a long-time lover. He knew that he was getting to her.

"If you mean about how to save you then yes," she admitted, changing the course of the conversation.

"I still think there's good in you."

He laughed out loud.

"Iris, don't kid yourself."

"I can see it," she pressed on.

"When you look at me. I can tell that you still love me. That love that you feel inside, it's a good thing. It's proof that you're not the evil being you pretend to be. It's proof that you can feel--"

"The only thing I feel is the insane urge to fuck you against that wall right now," he cut her off sharply.

Her breath quickened when he continued to advance. She scrambled backward, not trusting herself to be so close to the speedster that had her dripping through her undies with just one look. It was a dark glare--passionate, wolfish. Like he would take her here and now and there wasn't a damn thing she could do but enjoy it.

Barry _never_ looked at her like that.

Iris hastened her retreat, backing upon his every step closer until she felt solid cement hit her rear. She was cornered! Panic surged through her when a smirk of carnality crossed his (tempting, alluring, oh so inviting) lips.

_He's not Barry. He's not Barry, he's not Ba-_ -

But his mouth felt like Barry's as it took hers, tasted like Barry as it prodded her lips open, tonguing her with a commanding desperation. He smelled like Barry as his body crowded her space, smashing against her erotically. And god did he feel like Barry...

"Nnngh..." she was losing herself.

"That's right, Iris. Let go."

His lips found her throat while his hands found her bottom. With flash-speed he yanked her legs up around his waist. Just like at the factory, her instinct was to wrap around him. Her instinct was to submit to him.

"Barry," she breathed and he lifted his head to face her.

"No. Not Barry."

One hand moved from her ass to slid under her shirt. Their eyes remained locked as that hand scooted into her pants, fingers grazing the soft hair of her pubic region. Iris gasped as they inched low enough to touch the tip of her lips. Dark eyes promised pleasure, reminded her of that night when he'd delivered such. Those eyes left her wanting, left her needing, left her craving.

_Barry._

One name on her mind, she grasped his wrist, halting his hand's progression.

"I-I love him," she whispered.

She couldn't do this.

"I know."

He didn't try to force himself further. But he didn't pull back either.

"But you love me too," he said quietly.

She did, no use in denying that anymore, she did. Because even when he wasn't _her_ Barry Allen he was _still_ Barry Allen.

"I do," she breathed, feeling her resolve crumble.

"I do love you. Even though I know what you've done. I know what you're planning to do but...I can't help but to love you. I'll always love you. Every version of you."

His eyes glimmered before he could look away. Iris caught it, the moisture reflecting the overhead light of the garage. He tried to hide it, tried to turn his cheek but she placed both palms at his face, holding him steady. Keeping their eyes level. Absently she brushed a thumb down his scar, earning a barely audible sigh from the speedster.

He opened his mouth to speak. She waited. He closed it. But his eyes continued to well, emotion building and she knew he wanted to say something back. She didn't push him. Her heart told her to wait, to allow him to say it when he was ready.

He'd been so damaged, so hurt over the years it was only natural that opening up was difficult for him. She remembered Barry when his mother had died, the way he'd cried on her lap that first night. Savitar was no different; once the wall came down he too would need her comfort. She just needed him to trust her enough to let go.

_I can save him. I know I can. I'll never give up on him._

He shook his head.

"Iris..."

Her thumb continued to stroke at the burn.

"I..."

... _love you_ , she knew he wanted to say. Because his eyes were saying it, screaming it with his unshed tears. He'd said it once already, that fateful night. She had faith he could say it again. In an act of encouragement, she rested her forehead against his. This time he was the one to tremble.

A solitary tear dropped from his eye.

"I have to go."

He was pulling away. His hand left her pants and he dropped her back to her feet. When he attempted to step back, however she held his face in her hands. This was the breakthrough she needed. He was finally opening up. She wouldn't allow him to shut down now.

"Hey."

He tried to turn away.

"Look at me."

Another tear came down his cheek.

"Savitar. Look at me."

He was biting at his bottom lip, just like Barry did when holding in an emotional display. When he was fighting the urge to cry. Iris felt her heart weep for him, knowing that his pain was Barry's pain and more.

He didn't deserve any of it.

"I'm here for you, okay. I won't abandon you," she promised.

"Whatever bad happened you can trust that, right?"

There was a look of unfiltered affection in his eyes when he finally met hers again. Now _that_ look Barry pulled off quite often.

_He's still in there. I knew it._

She felt the moment, felt him slowly softening up when something seemed to catch his mind. He paused, a slight frown downturning his mouth. When he suddenly winced Iris was concerned.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"

With an odd look he took her hands into his and removed them from his face.

"You'd better get to bed," was all he replied.

In a flash of red lightning, he was gone.

XXXXXXXXXXX

What the hell had just happened?! He'd been with Iris, his beautiful Iris when suddenly he'd felt a sharp headache. Though it was brief he recognized the feeling--a memory had just been rewritten. Something had changed somehow. Savitar closed his eyes, attempting to recall what had been replaced. It was vague, rapidly disappearing but something about Star Labs and Cisco. They were talking, the shorter engineer excited with some idea...now it was gone. Whatever it was.

Wait, what had he just been trying to remember?

"She's gotten to you, hasn't she?"

The cold, emotionless sneer brought him out of his own head. He turned to face her, the frosty friend he'd recruited for his mission.

"You don't know what you're talking about," he snapped.

The former Caitlin Snow merely cocked her head to the side. He didn't like the disapproving look on her face.

"What?"

She shrugged.

"Nothing. I just thought you were stronger than Barry. At the very least smarter."

When she didn't elaborate he felt a surge of irritation.

"And now you doubt that?"

Another shrug.

"Should I?"

His temperament wasn't the best at the moment. His body was worked up with no release, his mind worked up over the lost memory and now this cold bitch was mouthing off. Frustrated, his temper got the best of him.

It wasn't even a second before he'd sped over and wrapped a hand around her neck.

"Don't you ever compare me to that weak little boy again! I am nothing like him!"

Killer Frost glared back, defiantly.

"You got something in your eye," she taunted.

His vulnerability exposed, Savitar reacted by shoving her across the room. He quickly wiped his wet eyes, cursing the emotion that had drawn them. Tears were for the weak. The weak like Barry. Not him. He was a speed god. Speed gods didn't cry!

"Leave," he commanded when Frost began to move.

He needed to be alone. To reassess his situation. To reassess himself.

"Aiy, aiy Captain," Frost sneered before sauntering off.

She paused long enough to offer her unsolicited advice.

"It's a waste to go chasing the past. You know what god is spelled backwards, right? If I wanted to work with Iris West's lapdog I would have stayed at Star Labs. With Barry."

He only glared after her, as she left him alone with those words.


	8. One and the Same

Iris found Barry right where she'd left him, fast asleep in their bed. A peg of guilt needled her for what had taken place in the parking garage but it was quickly overshadowed by the desperate desire Savitar had strummed within her. She could still feel his fingers digging into her thighs as he'd hoisted her up. She could still feel his hardness...

Iris found herself stifling a moan at the memory. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair but she couldn't help it. She wanted what he did to her body. She needed what he did to her body.

 _He IS Barry_ , she told herself as she sank down into bed beside her fiance.

 _Anything he can do, Barry can do_.

She scooted against her sleeping speedster, pressed her back against him. She wasn't surprised when he wrapped an arm around her, bringing her closer. He always liked to hold her in his sleep.

"Hmmm," Barry murmured.

That did surprise her. Was he awake?

"Barry?"

He answered with a sleepy "mmm?"

The wetness between her legs reminded her of the garage. Iris closed her eyes, her conscience warring with her hormones.

"I...I love you."

She could feel his smile as he replied.

"I love you too."

Then he was cuddling her even closer. The warmth of his bare chest pressed at her back as he spooned her from behind. Barry was sleeping in the boxers she'd gotten him for his birthday. No pjs as a barrier. Iris could feel the thin material that separated them against the back of her thighs.

_Oh god I need..._

She was throbbing below. Swollen and wet and actually throbbing to be taken. Savitar's rough kiss clung to her lips; she still tasted him and the possession he'd exerted with that lethal tongue play. Dominating her. Owning her. Claiming her in a primal manner.

Barry could kiss her like that.

But how wrong would it be to initiate with Barry when Savitar was the one who'd gotten her so...

 _"...I was once him..."_ Savitar's words when he'd pinned her to her car hood at the Wentcorp building.

_"...that thing you and Barry did last weekend--I remember every detail!"_

She remembered his hand as it had slid under her clothes, touched her intimate area before she'd stopped him. That hand--Barry's hand in her panties ready to make her feel as good as he had that first shocking night.

Before she could think it through, Iris captured her fiance's hand in hers and lowered it between her legs. Barry was still half asleep but she didn't care. She needed him and she needed him _now_.

"Barry..."

Her hips began to wiggle back against him. She heard Barry groan but he still sounded groggy. Iris lowered his hand to actually touch her wetness and couldn't help her whine of desperation as she arched. Behind her, Barry was beginning to harden.

"I-Iris?"

He was waking up. Good.

"What-- _uughhh_ ," he breathed against her neck as his body responded.

She turned her head the farthest it could go to peek back at him.

"Barry," she whined again, not a stitch of pride to slow her begging.

She felt him shudder excitedly at his name.

"Iris," he breathed back, the sleep in his voice replaced by arousal.

Then Barry took over and their clothes were flying across the room. His lips were on her neck, his hand between her folds stroking tenderly. Iris was so close she gasped and her sudden climax shocked both her and her speedster.

Savitar's dark glare flooded her mind as she spasmed, that look he'd given her downstairs before he'd pinned her to the wall. She rode it as her body completed, lost in those possessive green eyes.

"You're so beautiful," Barry whispered, his voice husky and deep.

He was a rock behind her now, hard and ready. She could feel his precum leaking against her bare cheeks as he suckled on her neck. Iris's eyes fluttered at the contact. There were times when Barry made love to her slow and sweet and tender. Then there were times when it was urgent and instinctive. Judging by her fiance's enthusiasm at the moment, tonight would be the latter. Which was exactly what she needed.

Iris moaned loudly as he took her from behind and the lovefest began. Neither held back their cries of pleasure, the clapping of their bare skin just as loud. Iris pressed back into his thrusts excitedly as he hit just the right spots inside her. Barry knew her body very well.

Her second climax rivaled the first and Iris threw her head against him. He actually cursed this time, squeezing her tight but being a speedster he had wicked stamina. He could go all night, even after cumming he could recover quickly.

"BARRY!!!"

_Savitar had her pinned, his weight holding her in place._

"...seee you!"

Suddenly Iris found herself on her back, her fiance on top of her as she'd requested. His eyes were a green blaze of lust and love and passion. Iris stared into them and suddenly wanted more.

"...harder..."

Always the perfect lover, her fiance obliged. It felt good, mind blowingly good but she still needed more.

"...Barry....harder..."

He grunted heatedly as he again obliged her request. Iris cried out at his effort. This was harder than they'd gone before. But still not hard enough.

She started to beg for more when he dropped his face to her chest. Worshipping her breasts, suckling and eagerly leaving his mark.

"God Iris..." he panted, switching between the two.

"Iris...mmm!"

Flashbacks of that fateful night. Of the rough thrusts that had rendered her dumb. Iris gasped as the two experiences muddled in her mind.

"Barry harder!" she pleaded.

She needed it more intense, more desperate. More (Savitar) primal. Barry was losing himself as he began to vibrate. He cursed out loud and still she needed more.

"Harder!" she screamed and when he complied, Barry's vibration intensified.

Iris threw her arms around him, squeezing tight as she took it all in to her core. Barry responded by reciprocating the squeeze before he broke altogether.

That last groan, the way his voice cracked when he came sent Iris over the edge and she was twitching around him in completion. He was still vibrating, drawing out her orgasm until she was dough beneath him. She was exhausted as he collapsed on top of her, sweaty and breathing hard into her chest. Like that night, Iris cupped his face in her hands.

She nearly expected to feel a scar.

But it wasn't _him_ , it was her Barry, so much like yet so unlike the scarred speedster from the future. But weren't they both her Barry, she thought in her post-coital euphoria. Weren't they one and the same? 

Barry was staring at her adoringly and she couldn't help but to graze her thumb down his unscarred cheek. His head tilted into it, his eyes glittering with love. When his lips curved into a smile Iris smiled back.

"I love you so much," he whispered, nestling into her.

She continued to stroke his smooth cheek.

"I love you too, Barry. All of you. Never forget that."

A tinge of guilt hit her at that last comment, knowing that it wasn't just for the man above her now....

* * *

Savitar clutched his head, grunting out loud at his discomfort. More memories were being rewritten. This time involving Iris. Involving tonight. Not long after he'd left her she'd gone upstairs to Barry. He remembered waking up to her ready and needy for him. It had been exciting. Spontaneous. And like no other time before.

That hadn't been included in his previous memories. Which meant one thing. Like that fool of his past self, Savitar had accidentally changed something in the timeline. Of course he knew what it was that had changed. Unlike Barry, he wasn't an idiot. It was his visit with Iris, their steamy encounter in the parking garage. Apparently he'd left her in an extremely aroused state. She'd needed Barry to help her deal.

The thought brought a sly grin to his face and he reveled in the effect he still had on her. Iris's body would always belong to him. As would her heart. He tried not to think about the latter, hearts and love were of no concern to a speed god. Just useless emotions that brought pain. Gods did _not_ feel pain.

But Barry Allen did.

The abrasion of a new memory confirmed that. Savitar fell back this time, the blow harsher than the previous. Well that was a big change. And just the change he needed.

"Frost!" he called to his recruit from the other room.

She showed up in the doorway, eyes narrowed in annoyance. She'd lost faith in him after his moment of weakness. She'd soon learn never to underestimate him.

"You rang?"

He ignored her attitude in the face of his new plan.

"I need you to gather a few of your friends. You're going to pay Star Labs a visit."

She raised an eyebrow.

"Friends?"

He smirked wickedly.

"Meta friends. The kind that can create a decent diversion. Keep Team Flash occupied for an hour or so."

Killer Frost folded her arms, interested.

"What've you got in mind?"

He owed her no explanation, but it was fun to give one anyway.

"I'm going to destroy that so-called saint Barry. And fast-forward the birth of Savitar."

* * *

 It was bright and early when Barry woke, a feeling of contentment in his every cell. Iris was still asleep beside him, her body just as naked as it had been before he'd drifted off. They'd made the most amazing love last night, first after dinner then later when Iris had woke him up. She'd pushed him in a way she never had before. He had to admit he'd never quite let himself go like that. Didn't really know he'd had it in him. But now he did and it had been exhilarating.

Barry leaned over and kissed his fiance's lips, half parted in deep slumber. Iris was still out for the count. All at his doing. He couldn't help the swell of pride that gave him.

_I should make breakfast._

She deserved breakfast in bed after last night. He tore himself away from the love of his life and made his way into the kitchen. After deciding on pancakes he went to work, singing to himself happily as he did so. By the time he was finished, Iris was still asleep. For a moment he watched her, tray full of food in his hand, admiring her with a lazy smile.

He hated to have to disturb her rest. Maybe he should call in another sick day at the paper? Barry was considering the thought when he noticed the dark marks on her breasts. Wow, he'd gotten very carried away last night. There were so many. He'd never left that many.

He set the tray down, leaning closer at his handiwork. Hmm, some were pretty discolored, fading even. Well they had been busy the past few days. He just hadn't noticed. The lights were usually out or...well when he'd had her bent over the kitchen table the other day it wasn't quite the right angle. The memory of it now was turning him on. Maybe he should wake her for an encore...

It was at that moment Iris's phone rang. Sighing, Barry went to answer. It was something they did all the time, having no secrets between them. No Barry had never asked for her passcode but if either of their phones rang the other easily answered. He glanced at the screen to find "S."

"Hello?"

Probably a source for one of her stories.

The line was silent.

"Sorry, this is Barry, Iris's hus--fiance. I'll wake her up now."

He hoped he hadn't spooked her source. Barry sat at Iris's side and gently shook her.

"Iris, honey it's one of your sources."

She didn't want to move, he could tell by the frown on her lovely lips. It was so cute he wanted to kiss her. So he did. That woke her and Iris moaned.

"Phone," Barry nudged it closer when her sleepy eyes opened.

He couldn't help his smile at her pouting lips. Iris hated to be woken up. She cleared her throat before taking the phone.

"Hello?"

Barry began combing his fingers through her hair when he noticed her go rigid. Something was wrong. Iris immediately shot up.

"T-that's fine. Um, yes those records you sent me were helpful."

She was stiff as a board, her body language screaming discomfort.

"Is everything okay?" he whispered, on alert at her behavior.

Iris's eyes were briefly wide.

"Yea, it's just this big story. I can't talk about it."

She was lying. He knew it and she knew he knew it.

"Confidential source. I'd better take this in the other room."

She rose, forgetting to gather the sheet around her and started to leave. Barry sensed her panic and shot before her.

Whoever was on the other line had her spooked. And the bastard was still talking. Feeling protective, Barry snatched the phone.

"Who is this?!"

The line went dead.

"Hello? Hello?!"

Iris tried to snatch it back but he was taller and therefore could hold it out of her reach.

"Barry please just--"

He tried to redial the number but her screen had locked once the call ended.

"Who was that? Were they threatening you?" he needed to know.

He needed to keep her safe. Iris was stuttering, which she never did.

"N-no of course not. It was work. I told you I'm working on a story."

Why were her hands shaking?

"Iris?"

Why couldn't she look at him?

"Iris, what's going on?"

She was hiding something, her demeanor said it all. He'd known Iris most of her life, been in love with her since he was a kid. He knew her moods. He knew her mannerisms. He knew her.

"Hey."

When she tried to turn away from him, Barry took her shoulders.

Whatever it was she was hiding, he would deal with it. They would deal with it together. But she needed to trust him enough to confide.

"What aren't you telling me?"

She usually did trust him. Even before they'd become lovers they'd been best friends.

Iris shook her head, still not meeting his gaze.

"I just..."

He touched her chin, turned it so that she had to face him. What he found only troubled him more.

Guilt.

"Iris--" the beeping of his meta alert went off and Barry cursed the inopportune timing.

He was in the middle of something deeply important. He considered staying with his love, getting her to open up like he'd done a few days ago. But the city needed him. He couldn't let it down.

"I'll be back," he promised, his hands still on her shoulders.

"And we're going to talk about this, okay?"

Iris nodded silently. Barry leaned in to kiss her then and held her just a little longer than he should. He felt her sigh into his chest, her arms wrapping around him too.

"I love you, Barry Allen. Maybe...maybe I love you too much."

He didn't want to let go. He didn't want to leave.

"You still couldn't love me half as much as I love you," he assured her and with a final kiss he took off.

 


End file.
